Panel 1: “Goodnight Phone,” a comic by Gina Winbrand. The title card is a night cityscape under a full moon.
Panel 2: A woman in a green puffer jacket walks into a room painted pink. He is looking at his phone. A notification labeled “All About You” pops up. He earned average strength and cash and the “Workday Completed” badge Also, his phone is telling him he’s hungry.
Panel 3: The woman is cooking a pot of pasta following the instructions on her phone (it tells her to stir). A notification pops up saying “Cooking XP”.
Panel 4: Woman taking selfie while eating freshly cooked pasta. His phone awarded him a “5K Selfie Milestone” badge.
Panel 5: The woman is brushing her teeth and gets a notification on her phone It reads, “Bed friend soon it’s time to sleep.” She looks at her phone screen, which shows her previous notifications and tells her she has 14 messages, 518 emails, one missed call and two voicemails. His life satisfaction gauge read, “Okay.”
Panel 6: The woman finishes brushing her teeth He takes out his toothpaste and his phone rewards him with “Dental Hygiene XP”.
Panel 7: She lifts the covers and climbs into bed. His phone is on his bedside table, his “desire to sleep” is high, and his Angel/Devil gauge is about 80 percent Angel.
Panel 8: The woman lies in bed. A pile of laundry in the corner of the room.
Panel 9: Her eyes slowly close, the page fading to black. Then a thumbs-up notification appears and his eyelids open again.
Panel 10: The woman’s phone informs her that “Your Chatter post was liked.”
Panel 11: Picking up her phone, she checks chatter to see that someone named @FoodieKyle liked a selfie she took earlier while eating dinner. (The text accompanying the post reads, “I’m having dinner!!! Yum!!”)
Panel 12: The woman scrolls through her umbrella’s timeline. We found out that her handle is @Gina and she has 1.5K friends and 28K posts These posts include dinner selfies, “I can’t wait to work,” “Wow, it’s snowing (with emojis),” and “Bored :-/.” @JaxonRaySings tells us about his new single, while @IntellectualSigma (with a classical bust as an avatar) promotes a course to teach followers to “stop being weak and start being epic”. @Dolce_vita publicly denounced her toxic great aunt Lorraine, etc etc etc.
Panel 13: Gina is still in bed on her phone, but a Bed Friend notification interrupts her scrolling to tell her that “it’s 10 p.m.,” which, she says, is her ideal bedtime.
Panel 14: Gina holds her phone to her forehead, looking frustrated. A notification reveals that his desire to sleep has decreased and he has dropped to “Devil” on the Angel/Devil scale.
Panel 15: Gina is still looking at her phone. A Snap Vidz alert invites him to “get caught up on Snap Vidz,” so he opens the app and swipes through a variety of boring videos until he comes across a woman wearing cat-ear headphones discussing her “favorite” mobile game of the year: Super Romance. Kiss Star (“OMG so cute!”) and Dandruff Picker (“It’s weird but so comfortable.”).
Panel 16: Gina lies in bed with her phone to her head, preparing to download Dandruff Picker.
Panel 17: Dandruff picker opens, letting Gina help patient Freddie, who has an itchy scalp. He is asked to choose between four tools: pliers, tweezers, a comb, and a double hook. Whichever one he chooses, he then uses the tool to remove the dandruff from Freddy’s head. After three rounds, he declared himself “All Better!” The game congratulates Gina and sends her a QR code with 54 cents off a bottle of flake free shampoo.
Panel 18: Gina is next to her, looking at her phone. He receives a notification that his “Grooming XP” has increased and his “Will to Buy” has also increased.
Panel 19: A close-up of Jin’s phone. She followed the QR code to the flake free shampoo page on a website called “Pretty Girl Shopping.”
Panel 20: Gina scrolls through the Pretty Girl shopping site, seeing items like Luscious Essence for $95, the experimental Laser Tech Face Improver for $795, and the best-selling Nice Cream for $205. She’s also invited to sign up for the Pretty Girl Shopping Credit Card.
Panel 21: Gina looks happy. A notification tells him that he has spent money, lowering his cash score, but increasing his self-worth and life satisfaction scores. A new notification flashed on the screen, causing her to frown. He looks at his phone and sees that Bed Friends has him ranked as the #23,498 best sleeper. The top six are Sean, Cindy, Anthony, Ralph, Laurie and Lalo.
Panel 22: Gina briefly puts her phone away and lies back with her hands behind her head, staring at the ceiling.
Panel 23: After picking up her phone again, Gina receives simultaneous notifications from Crazy Bait and the school chums. The first invites him to “Watch: Rude Karen’s Fight on Freak Out”; The second suggests she’s seen wedding photos of weird kids from her high school.
Panel 24: Gina chooses which app to open. His finger moves to the button and launches the app he chooses.
Panel 25: Crazy Bait — Gives him three scenes of “Airplane Instant Karma” and “Lady Has Meltdown in Air” with photos and videos, along with a nav bar of “Viral Epic Cringes OMG Yak LOL”. School chums show Gina a series of wedding photos. Class of ’08 married Erika Scotthaniel Bush IV. Tim (’08 again) married Caraly, their wedding involving an ornate horse-drawn carriage. Sloan ’07’s horse performed at her wedding. They are more images of horses than grooms.
Panel 26: Gina enjoys scrolling through the photographs and receives another notification. It shows him a brain icon.
Panel 27: For the notification “iRemember” from the previous panel. Gina is asked to choose between “delicious food”, “good dog” and “when are you in pain”.
Panel 28: Gina receives a slide show of images whose subject depends on the choices she made on the previous slide If he chooses “delicious food,” he’ll get a photo of a burger, a plate of strawberries, and a banana from a Chicago Cubs game. “Good Dog” is a photo of her dog, and a seal, and a photo of Gina hugging a bluey mascot, and what do you know – it’s now canon. “Times You’ve Been in Pain” features her various rashes, pimples, ear infections and other unpleasant physical phenomena.
Panel 29: Gina receives a “wistful sentimentality” notification while smiling at her phone
Panel 30: Another bed friend notification tells Gina that “being on your phone is fun, but so is sleeping at night. Get some rest!”
Panel 31: Gina pulls herself back into bed.
Panel 32: His eyes slowly close as in panel 9. However, this time, instead of a notification bothering him, he gets a confusing nightmare based on what he’s seeing on his phone. Phantom images moved back and forth across his field of vision.
Panel 33: Gina lies on her back, frowning. He receives a “nightmare” notification.
Panel 34: The Tools section of the Bed Friend app is open. According to a study by the Bed Friend Sleep Lab, Bed Friend users who regularly use the (Bed Friends) tool sleep 43 percent better. Gina is invited to choose between three tools: sleep sounds, meditation and coloring.
Panel 35: The content changes depending on which tools Gina selects in panel 34. Sleep Sounds gives him an audio player with several relaxing sound options, providing meditation meditation instructions (1. Deep breathing, 2. Focus on breathing, 3) Repeat 1-2, 4. Hello), and Color gives him a mobile coloring book. If he uses enough, an “Artistic XP” notification will appear
Panel 36: A distraught Gina lies in bed, clearly unable to sleep. He picks up his phone and reads Bed Friend’s pitch to upgrade to Pro: “Still can’t sleep? Try Bed Friend Pro! Advanced sleep technology at your fingertips! Premium sleep techniques and advanced technology result in perfect sleep.”
Panel 37: Gina looks annoyed on her phone. A helpful “Annoying” notification confirms this
Panel 38: Gina looks at her phone again. It’s implied that he upgraded to Bed Friend Pro and was rewarded with a screen full of Apples. Suddenly, more fruits—bananas, pears, grapes—appear. They started dancing.
Panel 39: Gina is on her back, off screen and smiling at her phone as the fruit dances in her bedroom.
Panel 40: Gina stares wide-eyed as fruit dances around her bedroom.
Panel 41: Fruit dances around Gina, whose eyes are closed. Finally, a swirling pattern appears and a “hypnotized” notification pops up.
Panel 42: Gina is finally sleeping and snoring.
Panel 43: Repeat of the cityscape from the first panel, only the sky is blue — it’s morning!
Panel 44: Gina wakes up, throws aside her blanket and gets out of bed. Notifications pop up for “hunger” and “urine”.
Panel 45: Brushing her teeth, Gina gets a notification. He pulls out his phone and finds a receipt from Bed Friend: he subscribed to Bed Friend Pro for $199 plus $22 in tax and fees for a year, for a total of $221.
Panel 46: Gina, still holding her toothbrush, looks at her phone and cries. His cash meter goes to zero, his life satisfaction rate is “terrible” and he’s hit a “Clowned Yourself Milestone”.
The last!
